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User blog:Tanline666/Danganrunpa: Chapter 1 - Untruly Safe (Daily Life)
Previous: Prologue - Ice Cold Isolation Next: Chapter 1 - Untruly Safe (Deadly Life) Hey guys, it is Tanline! Welcome back to Danganrunpa! When we last left off, the Runner, along with 15 other people, find themselves in the Tunnels, a facility with lots of mystery. As they make their ways around, a robot known as Monorunner appears in front of the now-residents and transforms the place. After an investigation, Monorunner revealed they are participants in a killing game. While the others merely verbally object to it, the Cheetah destroys one of the many copies of Monorunner and gets executed for it. What will happen next? Find out in... Danganrunpa! Congratulations to the winners of the Chapter 1 Free Time Poll! The winners are... Angel, Duplicator, Climber, and one I chose myself due to the tie...Gentleman! Expect their FTEs soon! Day #0: Night Monorunner: Upupupupu! Wasn't that an awesome execution? I put lots of work into it, so if you would like to thank me, you are free to do so! Climber: You... are certainly twisted... Astronaut: You do know the weight of your actions, right? What goes around comes around, Monorunner! Zombie: That... you should have done that to meeee. But nooooooo... you just decided to make my life worse by killing another person. Monorunner: Well duh Zombie! Did you listen to what I said? Only the one who becomes blackened can get executed! You know what would happen if I executed an innocent, mind you? Zombie: Whatever... how about we just go back to our dorms. This is just draining. Monorunner: Well... in that case, goodbyeee! Monorunner promptly leaves us, and everyone goes to their dorms. I am about to as well, but I see the Angel standing alone. Runner: Did... you feel anything during the execution? Angel: Not that much... Runner: You... didn't feel anything?! How could you? Angel: It was a cheetah. Of course it wouldn't really have a chance. Runner: But... Angel: Look. This cheetah was... certainly obsequious. It only acted on the decisions other people make, and showed its anger in a rather... gory fashion. Runner: But... she can't speak! So of course she would attack Monorunner! Angel: You... are referring by gender. Look, even though the Caveman knows it is female, it is still a cheetah with no free will. Runner: That... is rather rude. Angel: Whatever. The point is, it didn't understand the rules. 'She' apparently does not know what the word don't is. Sorry. Correction; 'she' does not know what the contraction don't is. Runner: Well... I don't feel anything gaining from this conversation. Bye. Angel: Bye. And so, we head to our dorms. Good night. Day 1, Breakfast Yesterday... was quite an eventful day. From the moment I woke up here, to the talk with the Angel... I hope this day is calmer. I get up and get a good look at my dorm. It has a TV in it, a table... basically what you would see in a dorm. I get up, and the TV turns on. Monorunner: It is now 8AM! As such, it is breakfast time! Head to the dining hall if you want to... oh! I forgot one rule I forgot to put on your e-Handbooks! A little ding is heard from my handbook, and I turn it on. RULE NO. 13 Attending a meal is not mandatory unless said so by the caretaker. Monorunner: So... you don't have to come to this meal! Goodbye! "Well... ok. I guess there is no reason not to come..." I head to the dining hall and see... mostly everyone here, except for the Caveman. He still must be lamenting the loss of the Cheetah... "Hello, everyone." Everyone is silently eating, and then the Angel turns to look. Angel: Good morning, Runner! "Um... you realize it is inappropriate to say such a phrase when one of us has died..." Skater: Well... maybe we should just eat the meal in peace... at least until the Big Cheese comes. 'Hey look! I am Monorunner! I like to enslave people and execute them! I also like to make lots of rules and make people cower in fear!' Astronaut: Well, there is no reason to cower in fear! What is the only reason? To be a coward! No matter what he throws at us, we deflect! Demagogue: Well... when you put it that way... we should smile. Zombie: Well... at least one smile won't hurt. And thus, the positive mood returns. Until... Monorunner: I found that very amusing... not. Child: Ah! Monorunner! How did you get here so fast? Monorunner: Well... I have an announcement. You must all go to dinner tonight; I have an important announcement. You must come to dinner, or else you will get warned. So please... don't miss the meeting! "Ok Monorunner... it better actually be something important." Monorunner: You bet it is! That is all I wanted to say! Goodbye! He leaves, and the people promptly talk about it. Skater: What could the meeting be about? Duplicator: I... don't know. Although it does put some thought into my conspiracy theory. Gentleman: When will people learn one day that your theories are utter blasphemy? Child: When the Bunny lays a golden egg... in which bunnies don't. "Well... this is certainly chaotic." Demagogue: You know... we should disperse to think on it more. Angel: That... is actually a good idea. Let's go. Day #1: The First Prizes Everyone disperses... and I have time to kill. Wait! Not kill... it reminds me of the situation we are in! Whatever... I have time to spend. But first... I think I saw something on the table. I head there... and it is a coin. I go to the vending machine I saw in the rec room, and put my coin in. I get a gift... and another. And another... 14 gifts?! I got 14 gifts! What the... Whatever. I might give these away. But first... I have to see what they are. Prize Recieved: Superhero Comic! (It is a generic superhero comic. The plot is pretty basic, and it looks like someone who is into that can enjoy it.) Prize Recieved: Chew Toy! (It is a squeaky rubber ball. I have a feeling that an animal here can enjoy it.) Prize Recieved: Tile Set! (These are some rather large samples of the tiles here at the Tunnels. I wonder who can enjoy them...) Prize Recieved: Rings! (They appear to be interesting... it looks like they stick to pretty much anything. Who would want these?) Prize Recieved: Notebook! (It is just a notebook. Who would want this? Probably to keep track of info...) Prize Recieved: Can Of Pasta! (It is just a can of pasta... it is pretty obvious who I can give this to.) Prize Recieved: Lubricant! (This is certainly helpful with various problems... but still... it isn't immediately obvious who this would belong to.) Prize Recieved: Pillow! (It is a spare pillow... but I know someone really wants it.) Prize Recieved: Box of Chocolates! (They look pretty sweet... perfect for a romantic occasion. But I know someone who needs them for a different reason, so...) Prize Recieved: Politics Guidebook! (It's... a guidebook about politics. That is pretty much it.) Prize Recieved: Science Textbook! (Is it me, or are these gifts getting too obvious?) Prize Recieved: Tie! (It's a tie. Perfect for anyone formal.) Prize Recieved: Toga! (It is a nicely knit toga, I have to admit. Prize Recieved: Scuba Gear! This isn't really conventional, but I have to give it to someone. I still have time to spend...so... I might as well hang out with the others. Free Time #1: Angel The Angel.. seems far from us. Maybe I can talk to him? Angel: What do you want? This isn't getting to a good start. Maybe I can give him something... I'll give him the rings. "Well... maybe we can hang out. Oh, you might need some spare halos, so here. gives rings" Angel: Thanks, I guess. These will come to good use... "I have a question... how does that ring float?" Angel: Hang on. He takes off his ring. Angel: If you want to know why, feel my head. "O...k?" It feels out of context, but I still do it anyways. I then feel something hard... so I feel my own head. It feels soft, but also hard at the same time. "Do you have something in your head?" Angel: A magnet. Don't question it. "Well... I guess that is how your 'halo' floats." Angel: Ladies and gentleman... greet our modern Sherlock Holmes. "That's... rude." Angel: Well, who said I had to be nice? "You... have honestly got a point. But still, it would be better if you could at least treat us like friends?" Angel: Tell you what. You gave me some valuable items and didn't even care about it... maybe I can be a little lenient. Well... that seems like a deal. "Alright, that is fine." Angel: Ok... please leave before I change my mind. "Well... got it." At least he slightly improved... I leave. Free Time #1: Duplicator Now... I have still some spare time left until the mandatory dinner. I should hang out with the Duplicator... Duplicator: Well... what do you want? "Well, I had some free time... so I figured I would talk to you!" Duplicator: Well... fine. I look at the capsules I brought. What should I give the Duplicator... aha! The notebook! Duplicator: Well... that is a rather polished notebook. I can get a pencil from the classroom, don't worry. "Nice. Hey... do you mind talking about your... black skin?" Duplicator: That... is rather personal. I wouldn't give such information if we just met. "Well... talk about your interests!" Duplicator: I think you know this already, but I am a conspiracy theorist. "Alright... that's fine... What do you specialize in?" Duplicator: Social interactions. I am suspicious of everyone here... they could be actually a wanted criminal or a heartless person. "I see... why do you do this?" Duplicator: We are all suspicious in this so-called safe place. "That's perfectly justifiable. There is no reason to doubt that, you know." Duplicator: I see... but that doesn't mean that I should really respect you, or anyone for that matter. "Do you have any... exceptions?" Duplicator: My son, my wife, and the animals. "Ok... that might be... wrong though. You never know if one of them is working against you." Duplicator: Ah! You're right! I should do that... "It's fine. Well, it was nice fun seeing you. Bye!" Duplicator: Goodbye. Just as I leave, I hear... Monorunner: Good evening participants! It is dinner time! You must attend this dinner, I have a big announcement! ...oh boy. Day #1: Dinner and Motive I make my way to the dining hall, and there, I meet everyone. Looks like Monorunner's warning did affect everyone. Even the Caveman, who is grieving right now. Demagogue: What do you think this announcement is about? Duplicator: I don't know. This has been advertised quite much, but Monorunner hasn't specified on what it is... Climber: Whatever it is, it ain't something good... Skater: What gives you that thought? Angel: Are you telling me you have been oblivious of the fact you are in a killing game? Skater: That... wasn't what I meant, but ok... Monorunner: Well, hello everyone! Welcome to the mandatory dinner! Zombie: Why do you have to beeeeee so cheerrrful? Child: You know some of us are still grieving over the fact that the Cheetah is dead! Duplicator: ...not so loud, Child. Child: Sorry... Gentleman: Silence, everyone. If that thing has an announcement, it is common courtesy to listen. Monorunner: See? He is on my side! Gentleman: Since when from this interaction did I say I was on your side? Monorunner: Um... let's just get to the good part! Demagogue: The... announcement? Monorunner: Yes, now shut up! Demagogue: You just broke your promise. Monorunner: Well... I was never fond of the nice thing! Just... since none of you are willing to kill each other, I am afraid I will have to give you something to make you kill! Skater: You mean... a motive? Monorunner: Wow! We have a modern Sherlock Holmes here! Anyways... the motive is... Monorunner pauses. We all look to each other, and then... Child: Can... I eat? "I think it is best if we wait for him to finish, ok?" Monorunner: ...your secrets! Gentleman: Don't be absurd... how do you know anything about our- Monorunner: -Secrets? Don't ask! Child: So you know about the time I spilled honey on my- Angel: Ew! We... don't need to know that type of thing! Monorunner: Nothing like that! I am talking about the juicy secrets! Every day, an anonymous secret will be revealed! If all 16 are revealed, you will be executed! Zombie: ...stop being so chipperrgh. Monorunner: Then stop being so depressing! Zombie: Therrgh is a reason, you know! Monorunner: This first secret, however, won't be anonymous! That is because its owner is dead! "So... you mean the Cheetah?" Monorunner: Correct! And I don't need to explain it! I'll just play a video! Suddenly, a projector slides into place, and a white projecting screen is shown. The projector turns on, and a video of a demolition derby starts. Announcer: Hello and welcome all to the official Demolition Derby of the year XXXX! We have got our star destroyers Speedy, Deadly, Fiery, and Danger on the track, ready to begin... and they are off! Deadly goes towards Fiery, and Danger is being cornered by Speedy! Wow! And then we have got... Wow! A cheetah! Must be a part of the show! Wait... nobody said anything about a cheetah... oh no! Fiery is being mauled to death, and the car has crashed and is leaking motor oil! The cheetah is now escaping the wreckage! Who will be the next victim... as Speedy tries to save Fiery by driving towards him, he gets mauled as well! The cars crash, and a big fire ensues! The stadium is being destroyed, and soon, Deadly and Danger will be burnt to death, folks! What has happened to this hopeful day?! The camera is picked up, allowing us to see the Announcer. He is wearing a blue hat with a microphone on it, along with some 5-o' clock shadow on his face. Announcer: Well... I guess I can't escape... time to end it all, I suppose. Goodbye! The camera is dropped, and we can only see his legs now. He turns around, and jumps out of the stadium. Moments later, we hear a thud... actually, multiple thuds as the film abruptly ends. Everyone is in silence. Monorunner: For reference, 600 people were in the stadium! 300 were injured, 150 were consumed by the flames while trying to escape, and 150 chose to end it all and jumped out of the stadium! Caveman: I... never knew this... Demagogue: How could... something like this happen? Duplicator: This is just... cruel... Gentleman: Um... not to spoil the mood, but how come the Caveman knows some proper English? Angel: Gave him a lesson. He appears to be a fast learner. Gentleman: Ok... "That... doesn't matter. The point is... that is so tragic!" Angel: I know, I know, people died... but still. The Cheetah' secret isn't a secret. It is a self-fulfilling prophecy. Monorunner: Whatever you think, aren't you thinking this place is dangerous? Do you really want to leave? Well, you can't! Skater: We... know that. Child: I am not hungry anymore. Caveman: Uh... yeah! I too! Angel: He still needs work on using "I" and "me", though... "Well... I guess dinner is over. Goodbye." As we head to our dorms, a lot of thoughts flow by. I woke up here... I met everyone... I explored here... we met Monorunner... we saw... the Cheetah's unfortunate death, the first breakfast, free time... and now this sad dinner. Ding, dong, dong, ding! As I hear that, the TV in my dorm turns on. Monorunner: It is now 10PM! As such, it is officially night time! Oh... and I forgot one rule about nighttime! Aren't I a riot? Well... I will add the rule, and then goodnight! The TV turns off, and I hear a ding on my e-Handbook. RULE NO. 14 During nighttime, the dining hall is locked. As such, you can't access any of the areas during that period. Well, that is all for the day. Goodnight. Day #2: Breakfast And as I sleep, I am finally comfortable in this bed. Maybe this is a safe place... but it is being manipulated... and just as the thoughts flow by... Ding dong dong ding! Monorunner: Rise and shine, everyone! It is now 7AM, which means it is daytime! The announcement on the TV shuts off. Will these be playing every single time it is 10PM or 7AM? Whatever... I head out of my dorm and see the Gentleman standing outside of his dorm. Gentleman: You are certainly early. "And... how is that relevant to anything?" Gentleman: Well... I am merely making note of the fact that you happen to wake up early. "That is only because of the fact that the announcement woke me up." Gentleman: You... are merely wasting time bantering with me. "But you were the one who... forget it. Let's just... go to breakfast." As I head into the dining hall, I see less people than before. They must be troubled by the motive. I only see the Skater, Gentleman, the Lizard, who is sleeping, the Climber, the Angel, and the Zombie. "Morning, everyone." No response. I go sit down and eat. Skater: Feeling down and under the weather? Gentleman: It is what everyone is feeling, yes. Skater: Well, the secrets will be anonymous from now on! Why is everyone feeling this way? Angel: You mean once again, you are in your little cloud cuckoo land and unaware that we are in a killing game? Skater: Jeez. Lay off... Zombie: Just quiet down... and let us have a calming breakfast. Climber: Man, I hate people in this mood. I want to liven things up, but I don't have the supplies to do it... "Why do you need supplies to lighten the mood?" Climber: Well, I have an idea, but I don’t know where to get the supplies for it. Gentleman: Enlighten us, will you? Climber: Guys... I want to host a Sports Day. Skater: Ooh! I am in! Climber: The problem is, while there are equipment in the gym, I don't have any objects to make a proper obstacle course. So... I am afraid it will be postponed. Zombie: That is a bummerrgh... Climber: I just hope I find something, or the Sports Day will be cancelled. Gentleman: I also happen to support this... we might as well get exercise. Climber: Duh... I have been getting daily exercise ever since we got here! Skater: Hey! Me too! Climber: Let's form a workout club! Skater: Ooh! I will recruit members! This suddenly got so peppy. I might join if I have time... Angel: Make your clubs and not care. Have fun. Climber: Can't we lighten things up? Zombie: ...Whateverrgh... As the others are chatting, I finish my breakfast. "Well, I am full. See you." Skater: Make sure to join the workout club! "Maybe I will..." I head to my dorm. Looks like I have free time... Free Time #1: Climber After breakfast, I decide to speak with the Climber to address the Sports Day, but also to check out her workout club. I enter, and see the Skater is absent. Climber: Oh! Hey Runner! Came to talk, huh? "Well... yeah. Of course. I am also here to talk about the Sports Day." Climber: We will save that for last! Just talk what you want to talk! "Well... I do have this gift." I give her a set of tiles. Climber: Oh. My. Word! Are those some tiles you got there? "Well, of course. I was under the impression you would use them for something..." Climber: Thank you! Now I can host my Sports Day! It is tomorrow afternoon, by the way. "Ok... what do you want to talk about?" Climber: Well... maybe I will start by talking about myself. When I was just 3, I always used to be quite rowdy. I come from this big family that encourages athletics and stuff, so you could say I had it in me! "Oh really? Tell me more." Climber: My siblings are big athletes! Like the Skateboarder, the Cyclist, and way more. "Are you related to the Skater?" Climber: While it may seem like it, nah. He is just a family friend. "So you knew each other before the killing game?" Climber: Pretty much! Oh, that reminds me! It is time for our Workout Club! We just have to wait for the Skater to arrive. "Well, he will arrive at any-" Skater: Hey guys! I am here! Climber: With that in check, let's begin! Event #1: Workout Club Climber: Your first exercise is some stretches to warm us up, ok? "Got it." Skater: Alright! The two start doing stretches, arm stretches, leg stretches, and more. The Climber finishes first, and the Skater is doing his leg stretches. I decide to join in and sit down to do some stretches. Skater: Aha! You are doing both of your stretches at the same time! Pretty intuitive, huh? "Well... if you respect what one is doing, why not try what they are doing?" Skater: Well, to be truthful, I am not a good multitasker. "It is just stretching. Get over it." Skater: Ok... Climber: Man, you are just talking about and not focusing on your stretches! Well, if you are finished, we can do the next exercise. "I am ready!" Skater: Same here! Climber: Good! Now do 50 jumping jacks. "Should be simple." We begin our jumping jacks, with the Climber finishing hers before the Skater and I. Must be more athletic than the Skater. We finish our jumping jacks. Surprisingly, that was actually quite tiring. Climber: You know, if you want to take a break, just say so! We will soon prepare for 25 pushups and then a minute-long plank! Then, do whatever! Play some baskets, do more exercises, or just leave! "Alright... let us take a short break." Skater: I am fine with that. We take a break, and then we go to do the 25 pushups. This time, the Climber seems slower. Climber: Ugh... I am fine! I am... definitely not fatigued or anything... "Well, maybe we can adjourn this." Skater: No! We work through the pain! We keep on pushing ourselves to the very... actually, a break seems fine with me. I am getting muscle cramps... "Alright, let's just talk and drink water." After Workout Club, we talk about our basic interests, and discuss when the next meeting should be. Nothing too special, but we are meeting in two days due to tomorrow being Sports Day. After that, we head to our dorms to rest until dinner time. "That was a good experience, I have to admit..." And as I say that, I head to the dining hall. Day #2: Dinner As I head into the dining hall, I see the Climber. Climber: Come to dinner tonight! I have updated the plans for Sports Day! "Well, of course. I was planning to come in the first place." Climber: Really? Sorry! I was just gathering everyone. "It is fine. No need to apologize." Climber: Ok! I promptly head to dinner. What could the update be about? Gentleman: Ah. Everyone has arrived. Climber: Yep! Should you announce or I announce? Gentleman: I am a more polite public speaker, so I should give the announcement. Climber: Fine by me! Duplicator: Could you please elaborate on this announcement? Because the Child won't stop asking, and you never filled us in on the details. Astronaut: Well, of course! What is up with that? Gentleman: Silence, everyone. On that matter, I have suggested to the Climber that we have some changes to the schedule. We shall now have a special breakfast tomorrow morning at 10:00 AM. Child: That was it? A breakfast? Thanks for nothing! Demagogue: Child... please don't say those things out loud, alright? Child: Alright. Sorry. Skater: Well, don't all events have to start with a special opening ceremony meal? It could fit the festivities! Maybe we can have a closing ceremony meal too! Gentleman: I don't see why we have to reject that... Climber: It would certainly set the mood! This is going to be a great day! Zombie: You are certainly trying to cheerrgh everyone uuuup... when you arrgh forgetting that it's motive time! Monorunner: Exactly correct! Astronaut: You... Pastafarian: Well, that certainly put the bright mood to an end. Student: Well, let us stay silent and see what he has to say. Monorunner: It is time to reveal a secret! Angel: Time to see what dirt is dug up. Monorunner: And... randomize! He brings out his special e-Handbook, and taps it a few times. Then, he starts speaking once again. Monorunner: While the last secret may have been non-anonymous, this one will be anonymous! Time for the reveal! A projector turns on again, this time not playing a video, but instead displaying text. A computer generated voice plays. Voice: I used the money I gained from my job to hire assassins. Demagogue: Wh-What... Child: Dad, what is an a sass sing? Duplicator: You don't need to know that. Angel: It is someone who is hired to kill people for money! Child: Really...? Demagogue: Why would you say that?! Angel: He wanted an explanation. Climber: Ok, if you are that person, admit to it right now! Gentleman: Why would anyone want to do that? Skater: Maybe the Astronaut did it! Planet Space Corporation is government funded, so he could be using the cash to hire assassins! Astronaut: That is entirely baseless, you know! Student: Just refer to it as the PSC... Monorunner: Upupupupupupu! This is certainly fun to watch! Angel: I know... watching them accuse each other... not saying I did it. Why would I even have the need to hire an assassin? I watch the scene in front of me unfold. From peace to madness, everything is happening at once. Duplicator and Demagogue trying to calm the Child down, the Climber and the Gentleman arguing, and the Skater accusing the astronaut. Everyone else is just either fighting or just staying silent. I have to do something. "QUIET! Don't you realize if we keep fighting just because of some hellish motive, the chances of murder are getting higher!" Angel: Come on, you ruined the fun. "Fun?! You think everyone at each others' throats is fun?! That is just bullshit! Now everyone, return to your dorms right now and please, calm down!" Child: Dad, what does- Duplicator: You don‘t need to know. Everyone else leaves, and Monorunner disappears, while Angel and I remain." "Why do you like seeing others suffer? Are you a masochist?" Angel: You could put it that way, but not exactly. "I shouldn't waste breath on you." Angel: Tch. No kidding. ''The night announcements turn on. Monorunner: It is now 10PM! As such, it is officially night time! Please head to your dorms, as the dining hall will close after the announcement is played. Good night! Sweet dreams! See you tomorrow... hopefully. The announcement turns off, and some iron bars start to drop from the ceiling. Oh no... "We have to hurry! Angel! Come!" He doesn't respond. I guess I will have to take him. I hold his hand, and then I run, still holding his hand. Miraculously, we end up in the dormitory. Angel: Did you just help your nemesis? "Nemesis? It is this early into the game, and you already call me your nemesis?" Angel: We haven't been on the best of relations. "Whatever, I just don't have the energy to fight you after this dinner." Angel: Alright, you can go to sleep. Good night. That last word sounded kind of forced. Well... time to go to sleep. I head into my dorm, and I sleep, just hearing the words the Angel said. And I only have one question. Runner: Why can't we all just leave? And with that, I sleep. Free Time #1: Gentleman Monorunner: It is now 8AM! As such, it is day time! Nngh... 8AM, day time, 10PM, night time... it is so repetitive. At this point, I will have to respect this. I just usually sleep in... I am still tired from last night. "Well, I need to find something to get me in the mood. Maybe I will go to the kitchen so I can help prepare the special breakfast today... ''yawn I better get out of bed or else I will fall asleep again." After shaking myself off, I see the Gentleman and the Climber head down the hall. "Good morning, where are you heading?" Climber: The kitchen, obviously! We are going to cook! Want to join? Gentleman: Please do not display such rude behaviour when organizing a congregation... Climber: Gee! Sorry! You don't have to be so 'oh, I am so sophisticated just cause I wear a top hat and have good grammar!' Gentleman: Do not judge people just based on how they look. Let us head to the kitchen. "Alright, let's go." We head there, and we put on our aprons, when suddenly... Climber: Oh! I almost forgot! If one of us cuts ourself, we should have first aid! You stay here, alright? Gentleman: That would be good to have some medical treatment posthaste. "It will be fine!" And then, the Climber leaves. Since I have some free time during the wait, I should talk to the Gentleman. "So, hello Gentleman. How are you doing?" Gentleman: Just patiently waiting for our young athletic lass to return. "Well, I am doing fine." He doesn't look that complete by waiting. Maybe I should give him one of my presents... aha! I should give him that tie! I present it to him. Gentleman: Why, thank you. "You are welcome! So... what do you do in life?" Gentleman: I am just a standard gentleman. I also have an interest in politics. "Really? What is so special to you about it?" Gentleman: I was always interested in it... yet the Conspiracy Theorist thinks I work for the government. "You mean the Duplicator?" Gentleman: Well, of course. I am just a humble spectator of politics. Why would I wrap myself up in a mess when I can just watch it unfold and try not to interfere? That would certainly pour kerosene in a fire. "Alright, what do you have against the Duplicator?" Gentleman: That his so-called theories are just baseless conjecture. He distrusts everyone for all of the wrong reasons. "I see..." Climber: Hey there! I am back with the supplies! Gentleman: Good. When you are finished, take them back to the nurses' office. Climber: Wouldn't it be smarter to take them to the gym? That way, if people got injured- Gentleman: Alright. Let's cook. Day #3: Cooking the Special Breakfast Climber: Maybe we should cook some steak? Gentleman: Steak? For breakfast? Climber: Well, I want to respect the wishes of meat eaters here! Gentleman: Maybe we should save that when we are cooking the dinner. Right now, we are cooking breakfast. "Maybe we should cook pancakes, eggs, and bacon?" Gentleman: This woman has conventional tastes for breakfast. Follow her ideals. "Gentleman, you can't force your ideals onto people, it would restrict their free will." Gentleman: Right. My apologies go to the Climber. Climber: Alright, who is making the dough? "There is no dough in pancakes." Climber: Well, to be honest, I have never really cooked. Gentleman: I have experience. Do you, Runner? "Well, I have cooked a couple times." Gentleman: Alright. We will teach the Climber how to cook. Climber: Ok! Gentleman: First, you crack the eggs like this. He cracks an egg and opens it. The Climber tries to do the same, but she does it too hard and it ends up shattering, but surprisingly, the egg bits end up outside the bowl, and the egg yolk and whites end up inside. One egg bit ends up inside, however. Climber: Like this? Gentleman: Well, not exactly... you mix the batter. He hands a spoon to the Climber. Climber: Oh boy! Time to shine! She holds the spoon as if she was going to knock the bowl over and make the batter go everywhere. Gentleman: Don't do it too forcefully though- Climber: I am going to do it! Gentleman: Oh no. When the Climber starts moving the spoon, we all expect something bad, but surprisingly, she does it correctly. Climber: Got you! Of course I know how to cook! I just wanted to see the look on your faces! Because if one doesn't know how to cook, they are damn lazy! Gentleman: If one swears, it is a sign of weak verbal skill, just to let you know. Climber: Fine fine! It happens to go along smoothly after that. There were a few blunders here and there, when the Climber burnt her hand cooking bacon and I lost focus and ended up burning a pancake... and myself when I went to check it out. Even the Gentleman wasn't free from it, as when he made eggs, a bit of shell got in and he burnt himself trying to get it out. Basically, we all burnt something, but luckily, we had first aid on hand. Gentleman: Well, despite the accidents we had, we luckily managed to survive the cooking. "Survive... oh, I remember. What if someone is planning murder right now?" Climber: Hopefully, nobody will kill! I want to make Sports Day a safe event! I hope nobody will give into the danger of the motive! "Would you look at that. It is now 10:00 AM. Everyone is coming here for the breakfast!" Climber: Time for my announcement! You guys can go sit at the tables! Gentleman: Alright, I shall do so. "Got it!" As we head to a table to sit, I look upon everyone. They look so happy... knowing one thing. Sports Day has begun. Day #3: The Special Breakfast We all eventually sit at the tables, with the Climber going in the middle of them. Climber: Ladies and gentlemen and boy! As you all sit here, some lovely food will be served to you as part of the special breakfast! Child: Mm! I can't wait! Climber: Our lovely Gentleman and Runner have helped prepare the food, so give them a round of applause! Runner: I don't really need it... Climber: Well, you did contribute to this awesome day! Gentleman: How would you know it is awesome if most of it hasn't even happened? Skater: That is a pretty good point. Climber: How about we just thank the Gentleman and Runner for their support in this all, wouldn't we? And then, applause erupts. The Gentleman and I just give blank stares. Gentleman: Well, thank you, I guess. Duplicator: You guess? Angel: Please don't start another pointless argument... anyways, before we eat, I shall give an announcement on behalf of Monorunner. Astronaut: Come on! What does he have to do with this? Angel: It is more technical, and helpful per say. Demagogue: Please elaborate on how this would be helpful. Angel: I will just explain. Sheesh... anyways, I have requested to Monorunner that the bathrooms should swap places with the pool. Climber: Don't be absurd! Areas just can't swap! ???: I think I may have to step in... We look at the entrance to the dormitory, and we see Monorunner, smug. Monorunner: Did you seriously forget how I managed to get the areas into the Tunnels? Climber: Well, how? Monorunner: Morons... anyways, I just assembled the areas together somewhere that you won't know, then launched them into space to float! Luckily, there were some backup fuel tanks, so I decided to use them in order to get them here! I refilled the tanks last night, so when I press this button, the two areas switch! Astronaut: Quite intricate, if I must say. Angel: I simply decided that if one has to go to the bathroom, they shouldn't walk all the way there. Think of it as a thank you. Climber: For what? Angel: Ok, just think of it as a gift. Monorunner: Alright! Now that it is explained, time to execute! Pastafarian: Who? I don't seem to see anyone break a rule. Monorunner: I mean the process of transporting. Let's begin! Pastafarian: I apologize. Monorunner: Whatever! And then, he presses a button, and it feels like an earthquake. The Climber and Gentleman are trying to protect the food, while the tables and benches are shaking. And then, it stops. Monorunner: Tada! Nothing was broken! Child: It certainly felt like things would break... Gentleman: Be glad nothing did. Now, we shall hand out the food and eat. Child: Yay! I am certainly hungry... And then, the food is handed out. The Astronaut takes off his helmet to eat, and the Lizard and Bunny are handed pet food from the kitchen. Gentleman: Bon appétit. Climber: Itadakimasu! Astronaut: Do you know Japanese, Climber? Climber: Nope! I just got that phrase from a Japanese restaurant I once visited and decided 'Bon appétit is so overrated! I am going to use itadakimasu instead!' Astronaut: I see. Let's eat! And then, we start eating. I shouldn't put this into detail, it is just everyone eating. Wait a minute... did I just break the fourth wall?! Whatever, I shouldn't question it. Skater: I am stuffed! Student: That was certainly an event. Climber: This isn't the event, Student! The event is when we play the sports! Student: Well, you are certainly looking forward to it. Child: I can't wait for the sports and games! Are you, Bunny? Bunny: squeaks Child: Awww... that is so cute! Angel: It doesn't understand English. The Rabbit could be excited about anything. Child: Shut up! At least I understand him! Actually, I don't, but you get what I am saying! Demagogue: Don't be rude like that, Child. Child: Sorry mom... Climber: Well, are you ready?! Everyone except Bunny and Lizard: Yeah! Bunny: squeak Lizard: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Climber: Let's go to the gym! Gentleman: Wait! Shouldn't we- And everyone heads to the gym, except the Lizard, who has to be carried by the Angel. The Gentleman and I are left behind. Gentleman: Wait until we finish digesting the food? Runner: Well, you know how hasty the Climber is. Let's go! Gentleman: Alright, fine. And we head to the gym as well. Day #3: Sports Day And after some walking, we make it to the gym. Climber: This is so exciting! Time to give my opening speech! Gentleman: A second opening speech? Doesn't that seem unusual? Climber: Oh, come on! That first speech was for the breakfast! I just want to kick off the first event! Pastafarian: I think it is best we let her do so, Gentleman. Gentleman: Alright. You may have your speech. Climber: Alright! She happily skips along to the microphone that had been set up there. Climber: And also, when I was having my break during cooking, I set up that microphone for the speech! Child: Daddy, is this the speech? Duplicator: No, she is just telling us how she got the microphone. Climber: Ladies, gentleman, child, and animals! Welcome one and all to the Sports Day! I hope you have a fast metabolism, because we are kicking the first event in two minutes! Astronaut: Two minutes to let the food digest?! Are you craz- Demagogue: Please be quiet. Climber: Anyways, as I was saying, the first event is in two minutes after the speech! Let's announce the match-ups! Round 1: Hurdles! Because there are only 15 people... Monorunner: Hold it! And then, you-know-who walks in. Monorunner: Are you guys at the dilemma at the fact there are only 15 people? Child: You were the one that caused that dil... dilly... thing in the first place! Monorunner: And I had a perfectly good excuse to do it! Pastafarian: Pardon me, what are you getting at? Monorunner: I am saying I would like to participate with you! Child: Fat chance, Monorunner! You killed the Cheetah and felt no remoss! Gentleman: It is remorse, and you aren't exactly in charge. Child: Remoss, remorse, whatever! Pastafarian: Please be quiet, Child. I believe Monorunner needs redemption. Climber: Well, shunning him isn't going to do anything, so maybe we should let him into the tumble! Pastafarian: What do you mean by tumble? Climber: Like fun, that sort of thing, man, the old folks just don't understand our youth slang! Skater: Climber, that genuinely sounds weird. Monorunner: Well, the Climber also said I could be in, so maybe you should follow her example! Astronaut: You were subtly selfish right there... Bunny: squeaks Child: The Bunny is right, you know! Astronaut: But I thought that you, Child, couldn't understand Bunny. Child: Just making sure he doesn't get self-constitutionalism or whatever. Climber: Welp, the break is over! Time to announce those in the first round! And... the Lizard still isn't here. Maybe it is sleeping. Anyways, Gentleman, can I borrow your hat? Gentleman: Please handle with care. The Gentleman hands over his hat to the Climber, who puts a whole bunch of paper strips in it. She then shakes it and draws out two names. Climber: Child and Skater! Child: But I just ate... Climber: Well, grin and bear it! "I don't think that is really the best advice, but ok." Skater: Wow! First round, and I get paired up against the Child? Aw, sweet! This will be an easy win! Child: I can do it! Duplicator: Go Child! Skater: Woah woah woah! She hasn't even announced the event yet! Climber: I don't want this to be unfair, so the first event will be the race! Bunny: *squeaking and jumping* Climber: Sorry Bunny, you aren't in! Child and Skater, get up to the starting line! And then, the Angel comes in. Angel: The Lizard fell asleep, so I was looking for a place to let it sleep. I apologize for taking too long. Child: Well, I hope he can sleep well. Angel: It can sleep anywhere, so why worry? Child: I have to get to the starting line, ok? Jumps to the starting line Wee! "You can do this, guys!" Bunny: whimpers Child: It wants to go to the bathroom, apparently. Climber: That is ok, take your time! Anyways... let us begin! The Bunny goes out to the bathroom. Skater: I will beat you! Climber: Oh really? After 18 laps? Child: 18 laps?! But this gym is very big! Climber: Well, I want you to run a kilometre, so... Anyways, go! And the race begins. The Skater appears to have an advantage, but then the Child proceeds to cut in front of him. And then, the Angel, Gentleman, Zombie, and Student proceed to go the bathroom, a minute after the other. Everyone except the Bunny came back later. Seems like it is still doing business. Climber: I swear I didn't put any laxatives in the food! I promise! "Well, you were cooking with us, so-" But before I could finish my sentence, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach. Oh crap... looks like I ingested the laxatives. "I have to go! Now!" I rushed over to the bathroom, and on the floor, I saw... ordinary pink paint. Looks like someone was trying to prank us. "This is quite a sick joke..." I then rush into the bathroom and well... I shouldn't describe it. After doing my business, I headed back, trying not to step in the pink paint. Climber: Ah, good! You are back! The Angel has come back, by the way. The Bunny however, hasn't come back, and the Lizard just didn't show up at all! Child: Well, maybe the Bunny is trying to find something to pee in. Bunnies don't use toilets like us, so maybe that is why. Skater: Focus on the race, Child! Or else I will beat you! Child: Oh no you don't! Duplicator: I am sorry Child. As much as I would like to support you, I really have to go, ok? Child: Where? Duplicator: The bathroom. Gentleman: I claim no responsibility for placing the laxatives within the food. And then, the Duplicator rushes out. Child: I will win this race for the constipated! Astronaut: That does not have context, you know. Skater: Just sounds wrong, and I will win! Not you! Child: We still have like, 4 laps! And I am getting really tired! Skater: It is survival of the fittest, for your information! Angel: Ugh... not again. It looks like I still have to dump a load. Duplicator: Son, I am back! Remember, you can do it! "Skater, keep it up!" Demagogue: Go, Child! Go, Child! Astronaut: Go, Skater! Go, Skater! And then, we start cheering for both the Skater, and the Child. The Angel comes back, and surprisingly, starts cheering as well. Demagogue: No... I am not feeling well, sorry Child. I have to go. Child: I can win! I will win! Skater: I can do it, I can do it! And then, we all breathe in anticipation. Then... ... ... ... ... Climber: The Child has won the race! Everyone starts cheering for the Child. Some of us comfort the Skater, and then we all have three cheers for the Child. But then... Demagogue: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! Child: Mommy! Duplicator: Demagogue?! What happened?! "I have to see for myself!" Everyone frantically scampers away from the gym. We all go to the bathroom hallway, and then... what comes next horrifies us. The Demagogue, taken aback by shock. The Child, in tears. But I don't focus on any of it. All I focus on, in the middle of the "paint"... ... ... ... ... Is the Bunny's dead, wounded body. END OF DAILY LIFE Vote on who gets their own block of Free Time in Chapter 2! Skater Lizard Bunny Gentleman Duplicator Child Demagogue Pastafarian Student Angel Zombie Caveman Climber Astronaut Category:Blog posts